February 2005

Last night was all about the Oscars! I want to go see Million Dollar Baby now, to see what all the hype is about. (But shhh... I already went to the movie spoilers website so I know how it ends. I'm just that way). Clint Eastwood's acceptance speech was very humble, very funny. I'm glad he won.

Chris Rock was an excellent host. I loved his opening monologue, urging directors to wait for "real" talent! "You want Denzel (Washington) and all you can get is me? Wait," he joked. "Denzel's a fine actor. He woulda never made 'Pootie Tang.'" I also laughed when he announced that it was the "77th - and last - Academy Awards". And while I wondered at first why Robin Williams came out with tape on his mouth, I realized it was a statement about being censored.

Hilary Swank's "I'm just a girl from a trailer park who had a dream" line made me laugh and think of Mare.

Want my two second thoughts on the fashions? Enough with the ruffles, Charlize. Bridget Jones, all grown up. Hilary Swank looked quite glam, and ever so skinny. Every year, Johnny Depp looks more and more like a cartoon character. Cate Blanchett - eh. She does look a little washed out. I loved this color on Kate Winslet. I honestly didn't recognize Drew Barrymore when she came out onstage. And Virginia Madsen! AAAGH! I hated this one! Too tight! She looked like a (shiny blue) sausage! I like Annette Benning's cute short hair. CuzGirl and I decided that Salma's hair was too much in her eyes. Kirsten Dunst looked cute.. and she was so funny! "I have to give this dress back...." Orlando ::growl:: so cute I could eat him up with a spoon. One never knows which will show up.. this year it was skinny Oprah. Penelope Cruz - so cute, but lose the big bow on your butt. WHEW! Too many thoughts in a row! I have to get more coffee now....

Can no one else in Hollywood sing? Why did Beyonce have to do all the work?

Jamie Foxx' acceptance speech made me tear up just a little. Thanking his grandma was sweet.

I'm sure there's other news going on in the world.. but you're going to have to find it yourself. I'm going to get ready for an early day at work. Talk to you later - Ciao!

Following dear Miss Megan's lead, I'm going to make some chili today. It just seems like the kind of day to do that - cold, grey, damp. (why do I live here again?)

If I can't think of anything else to buy, I buy shoes and glasses. These are my addictions in life.



Now I have to go buy real, useful stuff..like food. Have a good day. Ciao, Bellas.

They found my groceries, and made everything right again.

I took my laptop back to the Apple Store so they could send it in for repair. This is why I needed both a laptop and a desktop computer. How could I ever be without one? Of course, it's a little harder to drag the eMac around with me... heh.

Should I watch the Oscars?

Uh.... what the hell? No matter how bad my job is, it's never that bad.

People! this is why you must have a living will. I'll give you the name of a lawyer who'll do one for you. It's SO important.

There's other stuff in the news... but I need to go run my errands now. Talk to you later. Ciao.

Well, now they're just trying to make me mad. How, you ask? Well, first they forget to feed the kitties. Now, Simon delivered my groceries to them, but they never brought the groceries to me. WHERE'S MY ORDER? Honestly - I'm counting the days..

I picked up my new glasses last night. It's amazing - when they make the lenses with the correct prescription, you can actually see! (Do you see how I am today? I was far less crabby when I was on vacation ::smile::  )

Show of hands: who cares? Uh-Huh. That's what I thought.

And who cares part deux?

I'm back watching "Lost" again. Locke is my favorite character. Here's more info on him.

The most expensive car of the year: the 2005 Saleen S7 at $559,500. Pretty nice. You buy me one of those, okay? (that was bossy. sorry).

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you: SKELETOR! (Sheesh, Tori. Have a ham samich or something...)

Finally Friday, and since I didn't have anything better to do - like put my groceries away - I got the place all cleaned up and put back together last night. Time to get myself to work, so you have an excellent day. Ciao.

Four loads of laundry last night. Four. I didn't even know that I had that much clothing. Plus dishes and the ultimate in lazy-girl shopping, SimonDelivers.com. I'm almost all caught up at work, too. It's an exercise in not being distracted, and being able to do 5 or 6 things simultaneously!

Yes, I know I have an iPod... but I don't have an iPod mini. Look - They have a pink one! This is spelling trouble for chele. Now all day today I'm going to have to talk to myself about the difference between 'want' and 'need'.

Buh-Bye Randy Moss. This really doesn't even come as a surprise. No matter how good he is on the field, he's too much trouble off the field.

This is cool.. and the timing is perfect. "Do you believe in miracles?" Yes!

I can't believe that the Jackson jury is seated already. I thought that was gonna take years.. or at least months.

Look! My boyfriend #5 (or maybe it's 6 or 7..who can keep track these days?) Christian Slater is available again.

No, no, no. Camryn.. don't do it.

And in our "well, DUH" moment of the day: children are barred from crocodile enclosures. Next they'll be telling me that they shouldn't play in traffic, either.

Note to self. Never store super glue next to eyedrops.

We made the Onion!

Gotta go. You behave yourselves now. Ciao.

Good Day. Aaaaah. Coffee. Sometimes, until all the caffeine kicks in, one or two word sentences are all I can manage before 5:00 AM.

Well, eeeeek. When cats go wild. I hope to God Issy never comes after me like this.

HaHa. I often think it would be funny to get drunk, take my clothes off and run around the parking lot. Or not-so-much.

I've seen this before, but it still made me laugh - The Mapping of a Cat's Brain.

Wow. I left just in time. How much more rain can possibly fall??

Work was busy, but surprisingly, not as crazy as I thought it would be. Lots of e-mails to catch up on. I worked through the first wave of them yesterday (urgent,junk mail, newsletter, delete, delete, file away, print, etc.). I stood up exactly twice, and ate thai food at my desk for lunch. Today should be the same, and then I'll be caught up. Tonight is all about laundry (how is it that I can have THREE baskets filled to overflowing again?) and tomorrow the vacuum cleaner makes an appearance. It takes a while to get back to 'real' life once vacation is over. And now I'm going to work. Ciao, Bellas. Have a good day.

Wow. It's just like the whole trip never happened! That alarm went off this morning, and now it's just like any other day. I have to remember to still be on vacation in my mind.

Ah, how I missed going through the news! Here's what I saw quickly this morning:
Lots of people passed away. RIP: Hunter S. Thompson, Sandra Dee and John Raitt. There's an unlikely trio making the journey up to heaven together.

I'm not as into American Idol as I was last year. Maybe because the season hasn't really kicked into gear yet.

Best line by Chris Rock in this story about the Oscars - "Don't thank God. God's busy working on the tsunami, so leave Him alone".

Someone needs to help me understand the appeal of The Simple Life. It makes me irritated to just read about it.

We watched Survivor - well, watched parts of it, on and off - on Thursday. Don't think I need to see it this time around. Isn't it just a matter of time before ALL reality TV goes away?

It was only a matter of time before this would happen - viruses on cell phones.

Interesting - The top 100 gadgets of all time. From Light Bright to the Abacus to the Clapper to the Powerbook.

I'm gonna go read the blogs now. If you want to go look at pictures, they're right here. And then it's back to work. Have a good day! Ciao.

Okay, okay... The California pictures are right here. Buona Sera. I'm going to bed.

1. Luggage is back (my case was picked for "random physical inspection").

2. Kitties are well fed and happy.

3. My new glasses had the wrong prescription - so drove back and forth to Shorevillehillsbury twice (new ones will be in next week).

4. I'm gonna go get my knit on. That is all.

Wait - it gets better: They stopped feeding the kitties on FRIDAY. No wonder they were so very glad to see me Sunday night at f*ing MIDNIGHT.

Vacation is heaven. Home is where the hell is.

I got home last night around midnight. Unfortunately, my luggage decided that it still wanted to remain on vacation. Upside - I didn't have to worry about unpacking right away. Downside - Where the HELL is my luggage? At least it got lost coming home and not on the way out there. Lesson learned. Always, ALWAYS carry-on. Never check bags again. Ever.

I need to just sit and have coffee and start going through all the pictures. I'll talk to you a little later. Ciao.

Back at the Las Vegas airport. Take a look at these pictures. I can't believe I was there yesterday....




These were taken at El Matador Beach.



Proof that I was, indeed, there. A little damp, because we got caught in a downpour on the way back to the car...

We went to Sambos for breakfast (and you thought there weren't any of those left). It's the most UN-p.c. place in the world.. but I had really good eggs benedict there. Yeah, yeah, really fattening. Calories don't count when I'm on vacation. I just now decided that.

Thanks, Hon. I had a great time. Ti Amo.

Oy. I'm far too tired to put any pictures up tonight. I've been EVERYWHERE in California today! Well, down to L.A. and back. And Dame! says that it's supposed to be snowing at home. Eh. Maybe I'll be staying here. Mare, make sure that Issy gets fed. That's a full time job!

Good morning. Awoke to sunny skies and Krispy Kreme Doughnuts (hey - I'm on vacation so it doesn't count, right?) We drove up into the Santa Ynez Mountains yesterday - lots of great pictures from there. Today we're going south towards Malibu. Isn't there some way I could live here and be on vacation every day?

Maybe one more doughnut before we go..... heh. Ciao, Bellas. Pictures later.

Wow... I can't even tell you how nice it is here today. (don't hate me. I haven't had a vacation for a REALLY long time...). I'm sitting outside what would be my Santa Barbara hangout if I lived here all the time - Java Jones. (first order of business when I go anywhere - find the caffeine!). The day started with a most enormous breakfast - and then a giganormous walk up State Street. I've taken many pictures on the way. Here are a couple from yesterday:


This was taken just as the rain started rolling in.




For the first time in my life, I understand why they call these flowers "Birds of Paradise". They're gorgeous.

We ate dinner last night at Left at Albuquerque. I had the hugest burger with bleu cheese. I have to remember that as I'm walking up and down the street today - one more block and most of the french fries will be burned off..

I'm way less crabby already. I'm far less crabby then the kid who's sitting on the bench across from me panhandling. He's got a cardboard sign asking for "Spre change".. and he cusses at people who pass him by. Perhaps he needs to work on his technique a bit!

Have an excellent day. Ciao, Bellas. TiAmo.

The sun's out! I'm going to run outside and play.... But I'll put some pictures up in a little while.

Talk to you a little later.. Ciao.

Okay, well, the time thing is still messing me up a little bit. Why am I up at 7:30? or is it really 9:30?

I found a very tenuous wifi connection here at the house ::anxiously waiting for one more bar::   But I think it'll be okay for right now. It was actually sunny and nice last night.. last time I was out here, it was cloudy every day. We woke up to clouds again this morning, but I can see the mountains annd it's not raining. And there are palm trees and banana trees just outside the door. And FLOWERS! I'd live here just so I could have my garden all year 'round.

I'm going to run down to the beach for a while. Yes, you all wish you were me. Hee hee! More later, bambinos. Ciao.

Just one more thing from Las Vegas...
If I hear "Wheel.... Of..... FORTUNE!" one more time, i might cry. or go crazy. AND I can't believe the number of people who blow off the boarding calls and then stand and argue with the gate agents. It's their own fault! Make them walk to their destination!

This is why I don't run the airline industry, I guess..... That is all.

Cool. Las Vegas airport has free WiFi.

It's been a pretty uneventful adventure so far... which is okay. I never think that flying should be an exciting thing. I'd prefer uneventful. Just close my eyes in one city and wake up in another.

Is it time to make with the junk food and drinking yet? ::smile::

Nah, I'll save that until I'm on the ground in California. Talk to youse later. Ciao.

Okay - I think I'm ready to go. No, I know I'm ready to go. Everything is packed. Kitties are all freaked out because they see the suitcase ("that box comes out, then she stays on the other side of the door for a long time"). Most importantly, I'm ready for a little change of scenery. I heard it's raining out there.. and I don't even care. It's not here, and that's where I need to be right now - somewhere that's not here. A few days away, and I'll be a whole new chele!

I'll try to post semi-regularly from out there. Some of those coffee shops and books stores must have WiFi. I'll take lots of pictures, too.

My ride's coming at 6AM, so no posting from here in the morning. Talk to you later. Ciao, Bellas. Ti Amo.

Dear Internet,
I did something really, really foolish today. Now, I know what I did, so there's no need to confess it for the whole world and internet to see. I figure that it's a big enough step to just confess that I had a momentary lapse in reason, common sense and all logical thinking... and that I don't think I'll ever do it again. Goddam, I'm glad I'm getting on a plane tomorrow. I really need a break from life here.

::whew::     I feel much better now. I've gotta go pack. More tonight. Ciao.

HooYah - It's the first day of VACATION! Indeed, CuzGirl, I do suck. HehHeh.

I'll trip through the news later. Have to run to the Apple Store to have them look at my laptop (something's definitely going on with the DVD drive), and then pick up last minute stuff for the trip. More later, bambinos. Ciao.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Who loves ya more than me, really?

I didn't watch the Grammy Awards last night. This would have been something to see, though. I read that Melissa Etheridge performed, too, and got a standing ovation. You go, Girl!

If I were a bettin' woman, I'd be betting that Chandler's going back into spin-dry.

Who wants a hamdog for dinner? Just in case you don't want to click the link, a hamdog is "a hot dog wrapped by a beef patty that's deep fried, covered with chili, cheese and onions and served on a hoagie bun. Oh yeah, it's also topped with a fried egg and two fistfuls of fries"     ::burp::     I can feel my arteries slamming shut now.

OY! I should not read stories like this two days before getting on a plane. Note to self - refill prescription for xanax before the trip.

Last day of work before vacation - whoop! Knitting AND Buca tonight - Double Whoop! So time to start the day. Ciao, Bellas. Ti Amo.

Just a quick post this morning. I have to do some work for Turk - finishing up forms and stuff - and then it's all about cleaning and laundry. For yes, I have a glamorous life.

One story caught my eye this morning, though. I know I sort of made light of this yesterday... But it really IS a miracle. And the next time I think my life is hard, I'm going to remember Sarah. God bless her.

Gotta go. Talk to you later. Ciao.

:::doing the happy dance:::

It's Saturday! It's Saturday!

I don't understand nutball celebrity stalkers. How do their minds work? No one is more evil than Joan of Arcadia???? WTF? Then again, I guess if I DID have insight as to how their minds work, Maybe I would be thinking that Joan is evil!

Sad... RIP Arthur Miller

BWAH HA HA!!!

I got a chill down my spine when I read this story. It's the mid-80s all over again. Be safe.

It's a Festivus MIRACLE!

Well yikes. Time for mom to go to rehab.

I love this. I wanna go out in a pink Hello Kitty cadillac, okay?

I'm going outside! Still bundled up a little bit but hey - the sun is out. Talk at youse later. Ciao!

Don't ever think for one minute that cats are dumb animals. Issy-Cat knows exactly what is most obnoxious to do to get me to wake up and feed him if he's hungry and the alarm hasn't gone off yet. First, he picks a fight with Maddy-Cat. If that doesn't work, he moves on to chasing the ball around - on the floor, OVER the bed, on the floor, OVER the bed, etc. Next, he will start knocking things off the bedside table, one at a time. If I'm still not up yet, (I've probably banished him from the room at this point) he'll go out to the kitchen and upset both food dishes. Drag things off the desk. All the while this is going on, he's getting more and more kitty-pissed off! He's meowing and hurumphing and talking old-man-cat-talk. When I finally do get up, he's all sweetness and light. "Mom! How nice of you to wake up! Let me trip you on your way into the bathroom. Purr, purr, oh, how I love you and would like to stand on top of your feet, please. Would you mind feeding me?"

He's done eating now. He's back up on the bed, head on the pillow, sleeping. Damn cat ::smile:: I had no idea what I was signing on for 12 years ago...

The show may be funny, and the actors too.. but I don't know if I'll be able to get past the title

Ewwww! Ewwwww! Ewwwwwww!. No issues in THAT marriage at all, were there??

I love the Onion.

Starting the day in three... two.... one... go. Ciao, bellas. Have a good day.

As I was driving home last night around 9:30 I realized once again that music has incredible healing powers. Now, before you think I've gone all new-agey on ya, you've just gotta go with me on this. The whole day yesterday was completely nutty. Hell, the the whole year has been completely nutty. I felt at once scattered AND shattered. And then U2 came around on iTunes. The volume and bass knobs on the car radio can be cranked up to +20. Last night, flying down I94 east at 9:35, I had "Mysterious Ways" blaring at +19 volume and +20 bass. The mirrors were shaking! It was like Bono and the boys were in my backseat. I sang. I screamed. I pounded on the steering wheel. COMPLETELY theraputic. By the time I got to my exit and turned everything back down (I'm not stupid. I don't want to get stopped again for "excessive volume") I felt much more put-together. I slept pretty well last night. Every day, I'm coming closer to the other side of this.

ANYWAY - let's see what the news has for us, shall we?
Well, eeeek. This isn't good at all.

And this isn't surprising at all.

I'm hoping that my boss reads the news about the Desperate Houswives' bonuses and plans my bonus accordingly. (Hey, a girl can dream, right?).

Hmmm. I never thought that Bree was gay. My theory for a while was that REX was... but he had the thing for the stilletos, so not-so-much there.

Is the unofficial name of the Hallmark channel the "all shows that would make chele weep uncontrollably" channel? It's a good thing our cable line-up SUCKS and we don't have it on basic cable here.

Eeeek. She's scary lookin'. I, of course, am a super-model. Which gives me the right to judge everyone else's appearance.

Yay! Michelle Shocked has new albums coming out. And in other musical stuff - I like Scissor Sisters, too, but I don't know exactly why. In theory, I should find them annoying! But I don't.. I love their single.

Best line of the day comes from this story: "When you get a 50-foot-tall lava lamp, you end up with a whole lot of stuff." That's going to be my new life motto.

And away we go. Have a good day. Ciao!

One week from today I'll be getting ready to catch a plane. This trip couldn't be coming at a better time. I felt like getting all my weird news from one place today, so it was time for a trip over to Fark.com:

You've gotta hope there's a special place in hell for people who steal from mourners..

Jenny! Your boyfriend started a trend! Maybe you'll be dining in Kentucky? Let us know.

Lent starts today. I'm going to give up telling people what I'm giving up for Lent.

What's sadder here: That the fat guy didn't think he would injure anyone, or that nobody caught him?

Recovered memories? Or does he want to get another 14-1/2 minutes of fame?

Next week on "Jerry Springer" - this mess. (Read that and then realize that you own life isn't that bad at all....)

Indeed - what IS going on with Burt Reynolds' face?? Scary. (click on the picture for the full scary effect)

Look at these amazing pictures of snowflakes.

So, yes, I DO need a vacation from all stressful life, thank you very much. I realized that this morning when I glanced up at the calendar in my kitchen which stopped being updated just after Thanksgiving. Life's been a blur since then. It's been rough - more than I've let on to anyone (because I'm just.that.way.), and it's taking its toll on me. Time to go sit on a beach and put my little ducks back in a row again. I'll be fine after that.

And now - onward! Ciao, Bellas. TiAmo.

Good morning. Again. Maddy-cat is pretty ticked off today.. I am out of milk AND kitty treats. She's sitting on her chair next to me, giving me the evil eye. "WHY don't you go get me a treat? WHY are you just sitting there?" And then I try to explain to her "I'm out of milk! I'll stop at the store on my way home." Then I realize I am trying to reason with a feline. That's never good.

Good. The only line I would have had to read to convict this guy: "The archdiocese's own personnel records showed church officials knew Shanley publicly advocated sex between men and boys, yet continued to transfer him from parish to parish." What. The. Hell. Don't get me started...

On a more positive note: you GO girl!

I liked the halftime show. Paul McCartney is STILL the cutest Beatle.

Just in case any of you boys want to pick me up a little Valentine's Day gift...

More McDonald's rage. Heh.. He "returned it quickly" - he didn't throw it!

OK - I've got a lot to do today, so I must get myself up and motivated. Have an excellent day. Ciao.

Well... turns out that there WAS superbowl partying for me. It was fun, and we even (sort of) paid attention to the game. The commercials were good too. But most importantly, today is:

Top Ten List Time!

This month in honor of February and LUUUUUUUUVVVVV and all the sh*t, the usual group of suspects are posting our Top Ten Break-Up Songs. Because we're all just like that. My list will take you through the insane world of emotions you have to live through to get through a break-up

The first few in my list are the "ohmygod despair how am i gonna live i'll never go out again" songs. Because when you're dumped, you have to feel like that first.

1. My Happy Ending - Avril Lavigne
Oh, this one says it all! "You were everything, everything that I wanted. We were meant to be.... All this time you were pretending. So much for my happy ending." I love her. But she's a little young to be so bitter and cynical.

2. Baby, Don't You Break My Heart Slow - Vonda Shepard with Emily Saliers
"I'd rather hear the truth and have to say goodbye. I'd rather take a blow, at least then I would know". The universal anthem of anyone who's EVER been cheated on. It doesn't matter - if I'm with someone or if I'm alone, this one always makes me tear up a little.

3. Chain of Fools - Aretha Franklin
She shows up three times in this list. Miss Aretha has not been so lucky in love, I'd say. Haven't we all been there? You realize that you're just another link in the chain... (I'm growing more and more Avril-like. But now watch - the list starts to turn around!)

4. Diamonds and Rust - Joan Baez OR Judas Priest
Because I always have to have Joan AND Judas on my list. This is the song I'll first listen to when I'm starting to go from the "sad" place to the "mad" place after a break-up...when I can start to think about the person and not go to pieces. "Well I'll be damned, here comes your ghost again".

5. Insensitive - Jan Arden
Oh yeah.. Now I'm in the "MAD" place. "Maybe you might have some advice to give on how to be insensitive". Ha ha!!

6. You're So Vain - Carly Simon
And when the song comes around on the playlist, I'm in the "mad" place with a bunch of hatred thrown in for good measure. I can't remember right now if this song is about Warren Beatty or Mick Jagger or who.. but whoever he is - what an @$$hole!

After I go through the place-of-despair to the place-of-sad to the place-of-mad (which can take a day, week, month or year, depending on how long I've been with someone), I get to the feeling-much-better-now place. Then I have to listen to songs like these:

7. It's Raining Men - The Weather Girls
On the first girls' night out after a break-up, this song must be played, and danced to like mad-women. Also works for a girls' night out with the Pastors' Wives. (heh heh)

8. Sisters are Doin' It For Themselves - Annie Lennox and Aretha Franklin
A good reminder of the fact that you really don't NEED someone else to make you complete. Sometimes when I'm hauling groceries upstairs I think "If I had a husband right now, HE'D be doing this". Then I realize that no - he'd probably be upstairs watching TV, I'd STILL be doing this, and I'd be mad at him! Best to just do things for yourself.

9. Respect - Aretha Franklin
It's all about being respected, isn't it?

10. I Will Survive - Gloria Gaynor
Now before you start mocking me... just listen to the words:
"It took all the strength I had not to fall apart, kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart. And I spent oh so many nights just feeling sorry for myself. I used to cry, but now I hold my head up high. And you see me somebody new - I'm not that chained up little person still in love with you. And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free. Now I'm saving all my loving for someone who's loving me.
The best thing to do when you start feeling better is to listen to this song cranked ALL THE WAY UP on your car stereo (well, don't let the cops tag you for being too loud - heh!). You realize that you've lived through it. And then you want to do it all over again!

That's my list. As soon as I know who else has their lists up, I'll link to them as well. Have a good day! Ciao.

What a sicklet girl I am. I was fine at the Swellegance Elegance place, but woke up in the middle of the night feeling WORSE than awful. Yeeech. There will be no superbowl partying for me.

I TiVo'd the SAG awards - so don't tell me who won, okay? :-)

The West Wing is on a roll right now - better than ever. If I was a bettin' woman, I'd bet that Alan Alda will be the next TV president.

Well Thank God.. there will be no wardrobe malfunctions today.

I'm gonna go lay down. Talk to youse later. Ciao.

It's another beautiful day!

I might have to run to check out this new store. They've been talking it up on the radio. Then some general running around and about, then tonight is all about the elegance and partying. Whoop! How exciting..

Top ten list goes up tomorrow (one day early, because I have a Superbowl party tomorrow). Who else is posting theirs?

Have a most excellent day. Ciao.

What a GORGEOUS day! Welcome to February in Minnesota:


Did I mention - it's 60 degrees!

It was a long day.. I was at work waaaay before 5:00. Now I'm more than tired. It's couch time. Buona sera.

I have to be at work at 5:00 in the AM tomorrow, so there will be no posting at that time. Insomnia or no - even I have my limits! I'm off to bed at a reasonable hour. Sleep well, Bellas. Buona Sera.

Playing on iTunes this morning: Lido Shuffle by Boz Scaggs! I'd forgotten how much I like this song.

And yet another Star Trek series comes to an end. I watched the Next Generation ones, and a few of these Enterprise ones, but never the original. See? I'm not a geek.

Martha Stewart will be busy when she gets out of prison. That'll keep her out of trouble.

A grandmother confesses to cheating on a test in 1957. Was her conscience bothering her the whole time?

And on the other hand, this guy probably didn't have any guilt at all.

Hysterically funny! I know people just like this. Yeah.. and I'm crazy because I give my kitties cat-treats once in a while.

Well, this isn't a good idea at all. Note to crazy man: it's "diagram", not "diaphragm".

Yikes! Nice, mom and dad.. Hang up the phone on the kid.

Daunte, Daunte, Daunte. I'm sure he meant well..

I must get on my way now. Have a most excellent day. Ciao.

It's STILL foggy and grey. I can't remember the last time the sun was out! California in 14 days is sounding pretty good. I need to be on a warm beach.

Stupid football questions here. Cornelius Bennett wins for the best answer.

I hate those "tests of the emergency broadcasting system... this is only a test" crawls on TV. This is scary. Scarier still is that the police received no calls about it!

Okay - EEEEK and EWWWW at the same time.

I believe it - half of the bankruptcy here is due to medical bills.

Uh oh - the Pope is sick. Does anyone think that it might be from the GIANT BIRD that appears to be attacking him???

I've got not-too-much else going on right now. Let me get one more cup of coffee, then I'll be ready to start the day. Talk at youse later. Ciao.

Good Morning. Happy February!

It's kind of cool that Johnny Carson thought of David Letterman as the true hier to the late-night throne. But I wonder how Jay Leno must feel?See...there's always that small part of me that has to take the Italian guy's side.

What would Simon say about Paula Abdul's singing? I'm not all the way into American Idol just yet.. the tryout shows have been predictably horrible. Now there are two kinds of contestants: the ones who try to be good, and the ones that try to be the worst ever - both get their 15 minutes of fame. They'll have to try something else next year, or people will get tired of watching.

So much for Minnesota Nice...

I think that every day needs an EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK moment.

I also think that the first of the month requires some kind of meme. Here we go:

1. Open up the music player on your computer.
2. Set it to play your entire music collection.
3. Hit the "shuffle" command.
4. List the title of the next ten songs that show up (with their musicians), no matter how embarrassing. Write it up in your blog or journal and link back to at least a couple of the other sites where you saw this.
5. If you get the same artist twice, you may skip the second (or third, or etc.) occurrences. You don't have to, but since randomness could mean you end up with a list of ten song with five artists, you can if you'd like.
Here's what I just got on iTunes -

1. Hand Me Down World - Guess Who
2. Headshots - Suzanne Vega
3. Legend In Your Own Time - Carly Simon
4. 1999 - Prince
5. Circle - Edie Brickell & New Bohemians
6. The Sentinel - Judas Priest (proving, once again, that every chele-list has to have Judas Priest included on it!)
7. Big Time - Peter Gabriel
8. Girl Can't Help It - Journey
9. Live and Let Die - Paul McCartney
10. She's Always a Woman to Me - Billy Joel

Well - THAT was a little embarrassing! And now I've gotta go. Have a good day, kids. Ciao.