How is it possible that I only worked 3 days this week, and that it was exactly a week ago today that I had surgery? All at once, it's both the longest and the shortest week of all time.

Last night was the first time the heat went on and stayed on all night long. And two months from today is my birthday (so yes, shop early and shop often!). At times it seems that the year has flown by too.. but when I think back to first buying AudreyCar, or meeting il ragazzo or first starting construction, it feels like a long long time ago.

We're doing some moves this morning (well, I'm not... everyone else is pushing, helping and lifting) - so I need to be in early. Then it's time to keep digging on the desk. One day I'll be caught up again, I think. Or maybe not.

I have the weekend of busy coming up, so posting will be almost non-existent. Try not to miss me too much, and I'll be back on Sunday. Ciao, Bellas.

I'm a creature of habit. Once I get a pattern ingrained, it's there for the duration. I think that's what makes me a) a good blogger and b) able to function on as little sleep as I get sometimes, because literally - once the alarm goes off, I just go into auto pilot. Up, kitties, coffee, computer. I don't think I fully open both eyes until just before I start typing.

Some news, because we haven't done that in a while:
Another school shooting in Colorado. Oh my lord.. how scary. and how the HELL did the guy get in there? Those poor kids.

Reading this makes me think.. I should send back my Netflix DVDs, so I can get a couple more Sopranos episodes. Heh.

I am a huge geek. I think this article about the Mona Lisa is so interesting, and I probably need to get the book they're talking about.

I've got a ton of stuff going on between now and Sunday.. I don't know how the calendar filled up quite that quickly.

Yesterday was a lot more walking than I've been used to.. It's pretty achey this morning, but not swollen. That's a good thing. And now I promise we won't talk about it ever again!

That's all I've got. Have an excellent day, Bellas. Ciao.

Well, here I am, all up very very early before the crack of dawn again. I was awake before the cat-tles, even. I must admit, I do get the biggest kick out of being able to wake THEM up sometimes. Heh.

I'm a little nervous about going back. It's always tough getting back into the swing of it, and I'm moving slower, so I'm behind the 8-ball right off the bat. It'll probably take all of about 30 seconds to get tossed into it, I know. I can do it. I know I can.

The nurse took the stitches out yesterday. Honestly, that's been one of the most painful things in this entire process! The first ones came out easily.. she had a harder time with the third, and tiniest, set. Ow. I got a little woozy on her fourth try, so I'm glad she got it. The doctor showed my pictures from the arthroscope.. it's weirdly fuzzier than I thought it would be. I still can't tell exactly wear the torn up stuff was, but he could so that's what's important. He told me to get right back to walking as much as possible. So yay. I hope we can close out this whole chapter.

Send me some good thoughts as I start out the day, and I'll be thinking of you too. Have a happy day, and I'll talk to you tomorrow. Ciao.

Hello, hello. I can actually say that I'm looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. Guess this means that I wouldn't be a good retired person. I need to have structure and schedule in my day. Of course, after one day of insanity I'll probably be begging for more time off again, because I'm just that way. Never-satisfied-chele, that's me.

If you can stand hearing about it one more time, my knee feels almost 100% better. It even looks like a knee again, instead of like a football.

I spent most of the morning yesterday resting and moving slowly. I had to venture out twice in the afternoon - once to get some drugs and flat shoes (hooray for Target, where you can get both), and once to get some fixings for dinner. Il ragazz' was out riding in the early evening and I knew he'd be freezing when he got done, so I figured that warm-me-up-comfort-food would be needed: chicken and rice and biscuits. The house smelled wonderful. That's a recipe that'll get hauled out a lot this winter.

In a little while I'll fire up the work e-mail and see what has to be dealt with this morning and what can wait for tomorrow when I'm back. So I should start with the day I suppose. Talk to you later, Bellas. Ciao.

YO! I have returned to the land of the living!

I have learned many things over the past three days: the awesome power of codeine (and any "eine" based drugs, really), that it really IS possible for your knee to swell to triple its normal size, that putting on shoes or pants without bending your knee is hard work, etc. etc.

So for now I'm on the couch, looking at a few work e-mails, playing on the internets and still just taking it easy. I'm going to practice the stairs again a little later. It really feels pretty good. I go back to see the doc tomorrow afternoon, and I'll be back to work on Wednesday.

Thanks for all the nice notes and wishes! You peeps are the greatest, you know. Talk to you later. Ciao.

Pictures and words and stuff about the knee are over on live journal. Head over there.

Today's the day. Up early without coffee, so I can go in at 9:00 to have the knee done. Wish me luck. I'll update later here and on live journal. Ciao.

It always seems like a good idea - or at least not a BAD idea - to be awake at 12:30 at night. I'm not really that tired, and I'm either talking to someone or surfing the net or playing or SOMETHING. Then I decide that really, I must go to bed. And reluctantly I do so. Then the morning comes.

Bleah! I was pretty sad at 4:45, and still sad at 5:00. But now I'm up and the coffee is being slammed and gimme another 20 minutes and I'll be my perky little self again.

Oooh. We went to Timber Lodge last night (and I'll give you the reason for the celebration another day). We both agreed - the steak is consistently good there. Kincaid's was wonderful, and the steak there was great.. but ONE steak there cost as much as our entire MEAL at Timber Lodge. Can a steak be $45 good? You're paying for the ambience and the name at Kincaid's, too, in addition to the cut of meat in front of you. Anyway.. it was wonderful as usual, and the best part was just being with il mio ragazzo.

I'm looking forward to having the knee taken care of now. I'm sick of it hurting every single minute.

Tonight is tidy up the house (it's not even very messy) and get ready to be laid up for a couple days. Stock up on movies, popcorn, snacks and get the blankets and pillows fluffed up. I gotta get the desk ready to go today, too. And so we're off. Have a good one. Ciao, Bellas.

Good morning. Welcome to chele's casa de laundry. Heh. I've gotta get all this done before they take my knee apart, and it's EVERYWHERE.

A friend e-mailed me that her grandmother had died. That made me remember the poem that the hospice people gave us the day Papa died. It's so comforting. I had to google a bit to find it, and I shared it with her when I did. I want to put it on here, too. Mostly for me, so I don't have to go looking for it again when I want to read it. But I think you'll like it, too.

Gone From My Sight - Henry Van Dyke

I am standing upon the seashore. A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand and watch her until at length she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other.

Then someone at my side says: "There, she is gone!"

"Gone where?"

Gone from my sight. That is all. She is just as large in mast and hull and spar as she was when she left my side and she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port.

Her diminished size is in me, not in her. And just at the moment when someone at my side says: "There, she is gone!" there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices ready to take up the glad shout: "Here she comes!"

And that is dying.

Ciao, Bellas.

Hello. You've returned for more of the blathering..

I'm afraid that today I don't have very much to talk about. What? you say you don't believe that chele can be out of words?!!? Heh.

So let's do a random 10 song shuffle out of the iTunes and see what we'll be listening to on the way to work this morning:

1. If I Had $1,000,000 - Barenaked Ladies: it's a guilty pleasure song. "but not a real green dress, that's cruel." Hehehe.
2. Bleed Like Me - Garbage: Well, a little bit of emo to start the day.
3. Unforgettable - Natalie Cole: This is the song that we played for Papa at Sis3's wedding. I can't listen to it without sobbing hysterically while smiling at the memory.
4. Easy - Faith No More: I think I got this from one of my daily haunts, Friday Fishwrap.
5. It's Raining Men - The Weather Girls: This song reminds me of my friend Ms. Lee Michaels, founder of The Pastor's Wives Club. I miss him every day.
6. Loco - David Lee Murphy: I don't know what the hell this song is, or wear I got it.
7. Shy - Olympic Hopefuls: I try to like this band. I really do. If I don't like this song today, I'm dumping the rest of their stuff.
8. Unforgettable - Nat "King" Cole: Wow. Both of these versions in one shuffle. When stuff like that happens, I know that Papa's up in heaven watching over me. This makes me feel good.
9. Buggin'(Remix) - The Flaming Lips: Il ragazzo helped me find a lot of FL's tunes. They're part of my summer soundtrack.
10. Moon River - Audrey Hepburn and Henry Mancini: My favorite song from my favorite movie with my favorite actress. She really can't sing at all... but, hey, it's AUDREY. This will also make me smile all day.

All righty, then... I'm outta here. Have a good day. Ciao, bellas.

Yo, Punkins. In case you didn't follow my instructions to visit the weekend updates on live journal, I will give you the lowdown here. It was the weekend of mostly fantastical awesomeness. Friday night I did much rearranging, cleaning up, and baking because of the upcoming dinner soiree.

Saturday morning I was up early and headed over to Cossetta and to Target, when I suddenly realized that, logistically, this party was gonna be a nightmare because my house is approximately the size of a postage stamp and there weren't going to be enough places for people to SIT comfortably. Just as I was about to get hysterical about this, the cell phone rang. That ragazzo of mine.. did I mention he's like a saint? He was thinking the same exact thing, and said it was time for a change of venue. A couple of email blasts and phone calls later and we moved the whole shindig to his place which is far more spacious.

I got over there to start cooking at about 1:00 and by 7:00 when everyone got there I had a dinner on the table that would have made Grandma proud. We ate and drank and talked and laughed and really... that's what life's all about. Mother Nature even put on a great fireworks show for us when we were done.

Sunday was all about putting stuff back in order again. As long as I had everything at my place pulled apart, I took the opportunity to do some rearranging and cleaning out. I've got a better desk area to work in now. I phoned up my homegirl Megz for a long time while I was rearranging and she was painting (it's always better to do those things when you're on the phone and distracted a little bit). Then headed back up to chezRagazzo to gather up some of my accessories that I'd left up there. AND snacked a bit, because that's what you do with leftovers. Mmmmm.

And now we're back around to Monday. It's a relatively short week, because I'm off on Friday and have a doc appointment on Tuesday afternoon, after which I'll work from home. It's 49 degrees out there this morning. Hello, Autumn. I guess it's good to see you. But it best not be snowing and cold anytime soon. I'm not ready to let go of Summer just yet. I'm gonna go start out the week. Make it a good one, and I'll talk to you soon, peeps. Ciao.

It's the weekend. Go check out the LiveJournal.

Pushing all those boxes yesterday was probably not the best idea I've ever had. It was pretty sore by the time we were done. Yep. I need to get this taken care of.

Yes, another crazed day coming up. I'm glad we're through this week. It sounds like it'll be a blecchy day tomorrow. What's the best thing to do on a blecchy day? Why, have comfort food, of course. I'm making dinner for a bunch of peeps. Lasagna, I think. With some gnocchis on the side. Throw in some meatballs, some bread, maybe some tomatoes and sliced mozz'... it'll be good. This means that I have to get home and scrub, wax and vacuum tonight.

In fact, I might do just a little bit of that right now.. Straighten up, anyway. That's what I know so far, and I'm gonna dash. Talk to you later. Ciao.

I take back what I said about later times posting. I got up at 4:00 (well, 4:08, technically) because I have to be in at 6:00 to move some people this morning. Yee. Freakin. Haw. It's not just me - I have big strong furniture guys to help, and yes, we have lots of wheels and carts and dollies. Still, this can't be good for the knee. Now I'm actually looking forward to getting it taken care of. The sooner the better.

Dream last night - I'm in my mom's basement. It's really messy, with lots of record album jackets and maps strewn about, and there's a pregnant girl (not me) who's complaining about being there.

Basement: To dream that the basement is in disarray and messy, signifies some confusion in which you need to sort out. It may also represent your perceived faults and shortcomings.

Record Album: To see or listen to a record in your dream, suggests that you need to consider both sides of a situation.

Map:To dream that you see or study a map, signifies that you are being guided and led in a direction that will fulfill your needs and goals.

Pregnant:To dream that you are pregnant, symbolizes an aspect of yourself or some aspect of your personal life that is growing and developing. You may not be ready to talk about it or act on it. This may also represent the birth of a new idea, direction, project or goal.

I have some idea as to why all this family stuff is coming up again. Pretty much all of the significant events and anniversaries related to family happen in the Fall/Winter. It's been 6 years (really, almost seven) since I've had any meaningful contact with my immediate family (mom/sisters). I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss them on some level, and that I think about what it would be like to be in contact with them again. But I also know that I've changed a lot since then.. it took a long time and a boat-load of therapy and growing. I don't know where they're at anymore. So if I were to just walk in the door, brand-new me - they might be expecting the old me with the old patterns.. and the danger is that I'd fall right back into them. I worked too hard to get away from that. I can't afford to go back.

The life that I've built for myself now is better than I would have ever dared hope for six years ago. My job makes me crazy on a regular basis.. but I can do it, usually I thrive on it, and I get paid well for the craziness. I own a house. I have a cool-girl convertible-car. Most most most importantly, though, I'm surrounded by some extended family and a circle of friends now - a CHOSEN family - who love me for who I am and without strings, expectations and complications attached to that love. Loving them is easy and not painful. What I learned is that it's not always about what life gives you.. sometimes you have to go out looking for what's good. And once you find it, you appreciate it that much more.

You don't always get that much personal stuff on cheleblog.. and tomorrow I'll be right back to the usual madness, never fear. But it felt important to say that today. And now, if you'll excuse me, I've gotta go shove some boxes around. Talk to you later, peeps. Ciao.

Do you notice how the time on these entries is getting progressively later and later? When it starts cooling off like this, and it's still so dark in the morning, it's tough to haul myself out of bed. The snooze button got a good workout this morning.

We had some comfort food last night, and watched the 9/11 Documentary shot by the two French film makers. I'd seen that one when it was on in 2002.. It's still powerful.

One other way that I can tell it's Fall... the ragweed must be in full bloom. I'm sneezing like a madwoman. I've gotta go take some Claritin and start the day. Talk to you later, kids. Ciao.

Another busy busy day.. I'm used to all of them being chaotic, though. I kept track. By 11:00, I had 18 requests/tasks/urgents/do-it-now things come across my desk in addition to all the regular stuff. It really gets to be too much some days.

After work, il ragazzo and I had to partake of an adult beverage or two. That's a good way to wind down after a crazy day.I got home and went to sleep at 9:00. Um, yeah. I was a little tired. I woke up at about 1:00.. my body is so used to the 4-5 hour thing. I've created a monster. Got back to sleep a little after 2:00, though. I feel almost wide awake this morning. Seven hours. What a concept.

Oh - weird dream, though. I dreamed that my middle sister drove me in a cadillac over to my mom's house. Mom came out and said "You can come back, but first you need to go on MTV and apologize." Then my youngest sister (who had some weird eye-thing going on) got into the driver's seat and drove me away again. Let's go to the dream dictionary:

The car: If you are in the backseat of the car, then it indicates that you are putting yourself down and are allowing others to take over. This may be a result of low self-esteem or low self-confidence. Overall, this dream symbol is an indication of your dependence and degree of control you have on your life. I was the back seat passenger. My sisters were driving. Hmmm.

My youngest sis' weird eye thing: To dream that eyes are injured or closed, suggests refusal to see the truth about something or the avoidance of intimacy. It may be expressing feelings of hurt, pain or sympathy. Wow. This hits the nail on the head exactly.

Apologizing (on MTV, wtf.): It is representative of truth and forgiveness. It is time to let go of past grudges.Easier said than done, but okay.

Well... THERE'S some food for thought. I don't know if I'm ready to face all that just yet. But I'm obviously thinking about it on some level.

Oh - I've got the knee stuff scheduled. (I don't know if I've said on here what it is. Torn cartilage.. the medial mensicus, I think it's called, and I'm too lazy to go to Wiki and get the link. It's on my livejournal.) Anyway, I have to have arthoscopic surgery on it and then I'll be able to bend it again, maybe, which would be SO cool. Heh.

Okay. I'm gonna vamoose. Have the best day ever, and I'll talk to you tomorrow. Ciao.

Five years ago today...

I was working in my office and my boss poked his head in the doorway. "Some idiot flew their plane into the World Trade Center." At that point I thought it was just some guy who didn't know how to fly his little private plane.. and wondered how it was possible to not see those two big towers in the middle of a huge city. I'd been in them about 2 years before that. We'd taken the elevator up to the observation deck floor and spent hours wandering around up there taking pictures. They were the most awesomely tall buildings, with the most awesomely great views. Then about five minutes later Mac e-mailed me. "Something's going on. Look on CNN." Just as I started to click over there, my boss came back. "We've got the TV on in the conference room." I ran down the hall. I remember feeling vaguely panicky. I started watching the coverage just after the second plane hit. We all stood there in disbelief. And then one of the VPs said something that absolutely sent chills down my spine. "Oh my God. They know how to fly our planes." One of the women in the room started crying at that point. Then my cell phone started ringing. It was an employee. "They said on the radio that they're evacuating our building? Is that true? What's happening?"

The rest of the workday after that was a blur. They never did evacuate our building, even though periodically throughout the day random departments would just leave. I kept going back to the conference room to see what was going on, until finally they just turned off the TV at about 2:00 in the afternoon. The office supply rep kept calling me about something. I picked up the phone and told him I'd just talk to him tomorrow. Finally at about 4:00 I just gave up and left. I don't even remember if I told Mac I was leaving or not.

I got home and turned on the TV and started calling everyone. We were all calling each other. It felt important to know where everyone was and to know that they were all okay. I watched the coverage until I fell asleep on the couch. When I finally got up and got into bed, the only thing I wrote in my journal that night was "The world is never going to be the same again."

In the week after that, it was odd to not see any planes in the air. The day that they had the city-wide memorial service at the capitol, the fighter jets that were part of the ceremomy flew right over my house. Even though I knew what they were for, that shook me up a lot. Everyone seemed more skittish.

My life's changed a lot in the last five years. I'm still at the same job, but that's about it. I live in a different house. I have mostly new (and vastly improved!) people around me. I'm used to taking my shoes off in line at the airport. And those terrible images - planes flying into buildings, people jumping out of windows, the words "We're going to do something" and "Let's roll" - are forever burned into my memory. When I'm on the street, I look up at the tallest building in downtown, right across from where I work, and I think "Twice as high, two of them. Gone." Yeah - the world isn't the same anymore.

Today I'll be remembering those souls who died - the ones who were gone in an instant, and the ones who had to make the awful decision to jump, and the ones who acted deliberately to take down the terrorists before they could fly a plane to Washington. I'll remember them and I'll remember the people that I used to know back then and I'll be grateful for the people who are in my life now. It's that kind of day. A day to remember. Ciao.

It's the weekend. Go check out the LiveJournal.

Hello hello hello.. Sorry for the week of most extreme lameness in posting. It's just that life in general right now is either a) not very exciting or b) some stuff that I don't want to talk ALL about in public just yet, so you're getting a slightly edited version of cheleblog. Let's talk about just a few things, then.

Last night I was on the phone for about 3 hours in a row. I hardly ever do that anymore..most of my conversations are IMs on the computer now. It's convenient for ADD girl like me, because I can do 55 other things while waiting for the other person to type back.. but sometimes I do miss the connectedness that hearing a friend's voice brings. So yes, 3 hours, 3 gal pals, 3 different conversations. It was good. Laundry is 2/3 done, so maybe I won't have to spend the entire weekend folding and ironing. Also good.

Tomorrow morning is do-something-to-the-hair time with Aaron. Darker, this time. Lots darker. The red keeps getting brassy and I don't like that. Sunday morning is coffee with my knitty girls whom I haven't seen in forever because summer is busy like that. In between, before and after that is shopping and playing and stuff, including mucho de groceries. It's fall now, so the crockpot gets taken out for the season once again. I need to sit down and sort through the wintertime recipes. Two weeks ago I wouldn't have been ready to say that. I guess my mindset changes after Labor Day.

There you have it for now. Make it a great day, and I'll see ya tomorrow. Ciao.

That was really not nearly enough sleep. And I just realized that I have 9:00 activities scheduled for both Saturday AND Sunday. Whaaaa! There will have to be many naps this weekend, I think.

We had the best little grazing dinner last night. Ridder cheese is now my most favorite in the world. The description is right. Smooth like buttah. Served with a little cheddar and colby, some crusty bread, sausage, and for dessert - well, nothing is better than choco cake. mmmm.

I worked on a big long meme while I was waiting for dinner last night, and posted it over on live journal.

I haven't worked on my knitting much in the past couple of days.. maybe it's still a little early for that. I'll probably get some done tonight. Once I get four squares finished I'll start putting pictures up. I think this is going to be cool when it's done. Yeah. That'll be next Spring.. hehe.

Okay.. I guess that's enough of the being lazy. I have almost enough caffeine in me now to navigate around and get ready for the day. Everyone happy-up and have a good one. Ciao.

Good day, people of the internet. Lemme see what I can come up with here for news links.

It looks like the space shuttle launch has been delayed again.

Awww.. baby!

Well, eeeek. This guy just looks like a psycho, doesn't he?

Shoot. I'd wanted to watch Katie Couric's debut on the Evening News. Sounds like she did okay.

And I also wanted to see Rosie O'Donnell's debut on The View. Geez. I have a DVR. I should probably just set the thing to record stuff.

Emilio is engaged, darn it. Could they have not found a more flattering picture of him?

I need to go start the day. Going to try to keep working at clearing off the desk. I'll talk at youse later. Ciao.

It wouldn't have been Labor Day without the traditional last trip to the Fair..so the CuzGirl and I headed out there one last time. It was a gorgeous day, perfect for lots of people watching, which is what we do best.

Let's talk about a little news:

RIP, Crocodile Hunter. This is just so freaky. And to have it caught on tape.. *shudders* .. scary.

Look at this gigantic plane. Now, again.. someone needs to explain to me how these things stay in the air, exactly.

Did I mention that I know one of the astronauts on this next shuttle mission? Seriously, I do! I went to school with Heidemarie Stefanyshyn-Piper. She was a couple years behind me at Derham (my high school). There's my claim to fame.

I didn't watch any of the MDA telethon this year. That was the TRUE sign of Fall and of going back to school.

Okay.. time to go get ready for the next fun-filled day at work. Ciao, Bellas. Have the best day ever.

Why do we celebrate Labor Day by not working? Shouldn't we just work twice as hard?

Holy crap, Batman, what a crapacious crappy day yesterday, weather-wise. My poor little plants (the ones that didn't get sun-roasted earlier this summer) are now all water-logged. I did a little bit of running around early in the day, chatted on the 'puter for a while in the evening, then watched Transamerica (yep.. still loving the Netflix). It was just okay. This is why chele doesn't do film reviews. Heh.

Knee is a little better, but there still isn't a lot of bending or twisting I can do, and the one step at a time thing is highly annoying. The dumb thing is I bet I'm gonna go in for that MRI and they'll tell me there isn't anything I can do for it because PCLs just have to heal.

Here's something I wrote yesterday over on LJ. It was hard coming up with that many, let alone 100.

And with that, I'm gonna start the day. Talk to you later, kids. Ciao.

I think I'll make this a tradition now.. All weekend updating will be on chele's live journal, since I can post to it easily and from anywhere. Go play there now!

Good morning. Let's see.. After about 5 hours of immobility, the knee feels a little better, although I'm discovering that it really doesn't like any fast moving or twisting at all. I'm afraid that I did something really bad to it. I'll know at 11:30. And my finger is a little less gruesome today. Amazing how life just shifts on a dime, isn't it?

So yes, taking myself to the orthopedic doc at 11:30, and I might spend the rest of the afternoon at home. Lord knows I've got the comp time coming to me. It just depends on how I feel and how much I get done this morning. I made a pretty significant dent in the huge pile-o-crap that is the cheleDesk yesterday.

Then tonight we're heading over to San Pablo for some alimento mexicano. (How sad is this? I started out college as a SPANISH MAJOR and I babel-fished that to make sure it was correct...heh.). That will be a good way to start the long, last weekend of summer. I don't know exactly what else is on the agenda yet. It sounds like it may rain for at least part of every day. I'd love to get one more trip to the fair in there.. but if walking hurts, that wouldn't be any fun. We'll take it slow and one day at a time.

September 1 is a weird anniversary for me. It was 18 years ago (*gasp*) today that I was in the really really bad car accident and broke my leg. That also means that the baby I used to nanny for will turn 19 in December, that I would have known Mare, the-friend-who-doesn't-talk-to-me-anymore, 18 years in January (that one stings a bit. I wasn't ready to let that one go), and I've now known S-B boy for more years than I HAVEN'T known him, which is pretty cool.

And now it's time to go figure out how to navigate back down all those stairs. Agh. Here goes nothin'. Have a great day, and I'll see you tomorrow. Ciao.